I just found this New York Times article about social scientists looking to same-sex marriages to learn more about all marriages and how long term, committed relationships work.

It seems that much the opposite of destroying the institution of marriage, we married same-sex couples are raising the bar! Go team!

A study of Vermont couples in civil unions and their straight, married siblings showed that same-sex unions were more egalitarian than opposite-sex marriages, regardless of whether the gay couples were male or female. I love this snippet:

In heterosexual couples, women did far more of the housework; men were more likely to have the financial responsibility; and men were more likely to initiate sex, while women were more likely to refuse it or to start a conversation about problems in the relationship. With same-sex couples, of course, none of these dichotomies were possible, and the partners tended to share the burdens far more equally. [My emphasis]

Ladies and gentleman, this is what we call freeing ourselves from conventional gender roles.  Watch.  Learn.  Try it at home.  Enjoy.

Also referenced is a 2003 study published in the Journal of Homosexuality, which…

…showed that when same-sex couples argued, they tended to fight more fairly than heterosexual couples, making fewer verbal attacks and more of an effort to defuse the confrontation. Controlling and hostile emotional tactics, like belligerence and domineering, were less common among gay couples.

“When they got into these really negative interactions, gay and lesbian couples were able to do things like use humor and affection that enabled them to step back from the ledge and continue to talk about the problem instead of just exploding,” said Robert W. Levenson, a professor of psychology at the University of California, Berkeley. [My emphasis again]

So we have more equal partnerships, are nicer to our partners in fights, and we have scientific proof that (contrary to stereotypes) lesbians really are funny??? I mean, that bit about using humor – that’s proof, right? Good enough for me! This is a good day!

But in all seriousness, check out the rest of the article. It’s nice to see a calm and researched account of gay relationships rather than the usual lunacy and lies that are spread.  We are in loving, long term, committed relationships, disagreements and all, just like our straight counterparts – only with less name-calling.

Digg it