Feminist Housewife

Enjoying it

January 23, 2010 in Housewife's Life, babybabybaby, pregnancy, shopping | Leave a comment

In spite of all the gripes outlined in my last post (what a downer!), I’ve been trying my best to stick to my 2010 sorta-resolution and remember to “enjoy it.” Yes, there is stress a-plenty, and The Accountant is working lots of crazy hours, but the fact that wonderful things are happening in our life remains.

Last Saturday we carved out some time for ourselves to smell the roses. We had our home inspection in the morning, and left the rest of the day open to spend as we wished. The inspection went very well, and it was fun to get to spend two hours in the house and really look closely at everything. From the inspection, we went to Target to pick up some essentials and build our baby registry. While there, we did a little shopping for The Baby. We of course have the The Baby Box with some odds and ends for our boy, but with the end of the second trimester approaching, it’s no longer too early to buy him the things he’s going to need. There happened to be a bunch of adorable clothes on clearance, so we walked away with quite the haul. Here’s some of the cuteness:

It may seem silly, but it felt like a milestone. We went shopping for clothes for our son. For the first time. The Baby Box is now getting pretty full, and soon The Baby will not only have some things in a box, but a room of his own, and a dresser filled with his clothes.

We closed out our day with a dinner date in the city, at one of our favorite restaurants, something we haven’t had time to do in a while. We had delicious food, I drank two mocktails, and I ate like a pregnant woman (a three-course meal seems like just enough!). We took our time and enjoyed each other’s company, knowing that our days of three-course dinner dates in the city are numbered! It was a really wonderful day.

So while I may feel like we are speeding through the air at a frantic pace lately - I am determined not to forget to take in the view.

House buying, hormones, and big bellies – oh my!

January 21, 2010 in Housewife's Life, babybabybaby, pregnancy, shopping | 11 comments

I have a few things going on. I feel a bit like I’ve been catapulted and am now speeding through the air like a big pregnant rocket, with no landing in sight.

Home-buying is proving to be a full-time job. I try to tell myself that we are probably in the worst of it now, and in a matter of what? A couple of weeks? Things will calm down considerably, and then we’ll be able to just focus on preparing to move. But it’s hard to listen to myself when I say this, because there are deadlines to be met, reams of paperwork, and surprises at every turn thanks in part to the negligence of other people. I won’t go into the details because you don’t want to hear them anymore than I want to re-hash them. Suffice it to say – things are a bit nutty.

And I’m hormonal.

Ah, yes. Pregnancy hormones. The other day, The Accountant called to say she’d be working late. I hung up the phone, promptly stubbed my toe, and burst into tears. Not being able to find something to wear to work seems probable cause for throwing myself dramatically back into bed and pouting for the day (I haven’t given in to this urge – but it’s tempting!). The hormones seem to make every feeling feel bigger and badder.

And speaking of finding something to wear, I am rapidly outgrowing phase one of my maternity wardrobe. Luckily, my collection of maternity dresses is still in the game, but my old jeans are done for, and the shirts that seemed big at the beginning are now getting to be too short to cover my growing belly. And bras? Don’t get me started on bras. I will not buy more bras because I know my boobs are just going to get bigger (closer to my due date I’ll get some nursing bras), and I already bought some in a cup size larger earlier in the pregnancy, so I’m trying to make do with what I have, adding extenders to give myself more room to breathe. The extenders are a fairly decent solution, as they keep me from being in actual pain, but I am never fully comfortable.

Jeans are another problem. I was wearing low-rise, under the belly maternity jeans until recently, but now they just plain don’t fit. So I figured it was time to switch to the more old school, big stretchy belly-panel jeans. I tried some on at a maternity store, thought they seemed great, and bought three pairs. It turns out, they are not great. Not great at all. The panel isn’t snug enough to keep them up, so they are constantly sliding down! And I mean constantly. To make matters more interesting, the stretchy panel on two of the three pairs is light tan (the other is navy), so if the pants slide enough (and they do!) that the panel peeks out from under my shirt, it looks like I am flashing some belly skin…not exactly the look I’m going for at work! I don’t want to be the pregnant flasher.

So my boobs are always uncomfortable, my pants are always falling, and my shirts are riding up. I spend all day futzing and twitching and fixing and it is exhausting. And now The Baby is getting big enough that he is sometimes poking and prodding me in very uncomfortable ways, which means that at moments of the perfect storm, I am uncomfortable everywhere. And of course the hormones are a-ragin’, making all of this discomfort so much more pleasant to deal with!

I think the most frustrating part of it is feeling like Debbie Downer. I really do love being pregnant. I love feeling our little boy kick and dance and karate chop and whatever the hell else he is doing in there (he is really active!). I love knowing that I am taking care of him and nourishing him so he can grow and thrive. So my clothes being super uncomfortable and aggravating makes me bummed out about being uncomfortable and aggravated when I’d rather be just enjoying my pregnancy, you know? I’m pregnant! That is amazing and wonderful and exciting! I don’t want to be thinking about my pants this much!!

I just reread that last paragraph… It’s official: I am a crazy, hormonal pregnant lady. Hear me roar.

What a difference a year makes

January 13, 2010 in Housewife's Life, babybabybaby, pregnancy | Leave a comment

The arrival of 2009 intensified my excitement for and anticipation of The Accountant and I growing our family. We knew that 2009 was the year. The year we would start trying to get pregnant, and with a little luck, it could be the year that it worked. We had planned for a long time to get started in late summer 2009, and finally, 2009 had arrived. I couldn’t help visions of fast success and daydreams of a baby due in May 2010. At the same time, I was fighting fears of months and months passing, draining our bank account and our hopes while we tried and tried to conceive with no success. It was exciting, and it was scary. We had been living in our apartment for about 6 months, and were already thinking about our next move – homeownership. We had a lot of saving to do, lots of decisions to make, and lots to look forward to.

And now, here I am at the start of 2010. Six months pregnant with our baby boy. The Baby, who is due in May, and is already so very loved. We have also begun the process of buying our first house – there’s still much to do be done before we have keys in hand, but we are so thrilled. So much has changed in the last twelve months, and so many changes are yet to come in the next.

2009/2010

December 31, 2009 in Housewife's Life, babybabybaby, pregnancy | 3 comments

It’s that time again – time for reflection and resolutions. Time to say goodbye to 2009 and welcome 2010. A new year, a new decade, new adventures to come.

I really can’t complain too much about 2009. After all, this was the year I got pregnant! I am so overjoyed to be entering 2010, the year The Accountant and I become mommies. Throughout our Xmas preparations and celebrations, I couldn’t help but think about next year – when we’d be doing it all with our little boy, as a family of three.

There’s so much to look forward to in 2010. But for now, I’d like to take a look back at all that happened in ‘09:

– I thought about having a baby. A lot.

– I spent a month being unemployed and found a new job.

– I discovered the joy of cooking in advance.

– I saw equal marriage rights become a reality in Iowa, Vermont, Maine, and New Hampshire. And sadly, watched our victory be taken away in Maine and California.

– I reflected on my own wonderful marriage.

– The Accountant and I spruced up our back porch and second bedroom.

– We had a whirlwind summer, with a wonderful week spent in Provincetown, a trip to Newport, and a trip to the country to see family.

– I celebrated some of my “New Gay Heroes.”

– The Accountant and I embarked on trying to get me pregnant, and were incredibly fortunate to have success right away!

– We found out that we are having a boy, and started taking the first steps to buy our first home.

So what about that resolution? Well, I’m not too big on formal resolutions, but with all that we have coming in the next 12 months, I want to remember to enjoy it. Yes, there will be stresses a-plenty as we buy a home, become parents, and adjust to living on one income, but it’s everything that we’ve been working towards and waiting for, and I just want to remember to take a look around enjoy it all whenever I can.

Sincere wishes for a healthy and happy New Year, from my home to yours.

xo,
Feminist Housewife

For our next trick: A house

December 30, 2009 in Housewife's Life, babybabybaby, domesticity, pregnancy | 4 comments

First of all, I’m a little behind on news – we found out a couple of weeks ago that we are having a boy! It was wonderful to see him on the screen at the ultrasound and walk away with lots of pictures of our handsome boy. It’s fun now to be able to refer to The Baby by his name, and to know “who’s in there.”

At five and a half months along (22 weeks), I am definitely feeling the itch of wanting to get things ready for The Baby’s arrival! Unfortunately, there’s only so much I can do, as we plan to move before he comes. That’s right, The House is a-comin’! I have talked before about The Accountant and I saving for a house, and now, the time to buy is near. After much research, we have decided on a townhouse (rather than a single family home) in a suburb that isn’t too terribly far from Boston. There are a couple of townhouses on the market we are very interested in, so we’ll be going to viewings of them very soon. We’ve been approved by the bank, so now we just need to pick our favorite, make an offer, and cross our fingers!

The idea of moving so close to The Baby’s due date (making an offer in January, we likely won’t be moving until March…The Baby is due May 5th) is certainly daunting, but we really feel it will be worth it to get settled into our new home before he arrives, rather than trying to make room in our apartment for the time being and then house-hunting with an infant. Plus, we are fortunate to have caring family close by who have already offered their help with the move – the more hands, the better when it comes to cleaning and painting!

And speaking of painting… You know I’ve been thinking about The Baby’s room! Yes, with the townhouse, The Baby will have his very own room, and I will finally get to put all of my nursery decor daydreaming into action! I know you’ll be shocked to hear that I have yet another new idea for the nursery… Just look at these lovely green nurseries, both from the always fabulous ohdeedoh (click each to go to ohdeedoh and see more pics):

As soon as I showed the second picture to the Accountant, it was decided. That is out paint color. The Baby’s room will be green.

Now, if we could just get through this whole “buying” and “moving” business…

New Gay Heroes: Portia de Rossi

December 7, 2009 in Gay Marriage in CA, New Gay Heroes, equal rights, gay stuff, gay weddings, politics, pop culture, television, women in entertainment | Leave a comment

It’s been months since I posted an installment of New Gay Heroes. I’ve had a couple of posts for the series in mind for quite some time, but just haven’t gotten around to actually writing and posting them. This weekend, though, I saw a little snippet on the Huffington Post that lit a fire under me to get going. So without further ado…

Portia de Rossi

It’s true that when we think of famous lesbians, the first blonde to come to mind might be her wife, but Portia de Rossi is surely a New Gay Hero in her own right.

She and wife Ellen do wonderful things for lesbian visibility by being out, being themselves and sharing their lives with the public. Whether they are beaming in the glow of their engagement on the red carpet…

Sharing their wedding photos in People magazine…

Playing the Newlywed Game and speaking candidly about their life and love on Ellen’s talk show…

Or talking about equal marriage rights on Oprah…

Ellen and Portia are, together, such a wonderful positive representation for lesbians and same-sex marriage.

But on her own, Portia has this habit of appearing on talk shows and effortlessly and eloquently speaking about marriage equality. Just last week, she quite calmly fielded the (at times bizarre) questions of the ladies at The View with poise:

The very same day she also stopped by Good Morning America, where she again spoke about her marriage to Ellen and equal rights (that starts at about three minutes in):

I just love the way Portia speaks about equal marriage rights with such grace and ease. She makes it sound just as simple as it should – if we don’t have marriage, we don’t have equal rights. Plain and simple. Portia always manages to explain that marriage is different from being “partnered” or “unioned” or whatever other nonsense opponents of our rights try to sell us – and she always does it without breaking a sweat.

Portia de Rossi is a New Gay Hero for sure.

A quick update (between snacks)

December 2, 2009 in Housewife's Life, babybabybaby, pregnancy | 2 comments

Today I’m 18 weeks, or four and a half months along.

Things the baby likes:

Turkey bacon
Dried pineapple
Ice cream

Things the baby does not like:

Toothpaste
Cereal
Chicken Parmesan

New favorite maternity outfit:

Purple striped tee with grey cardigan open over it from (where else?) Old Navy with jeans.

Countdown to ultrasound:
12 days
(I so hope we can see if it’s a boy or a girl!)

New symptom:
INCREASE IN APPETITE!!!!!!! The Baby is hungry!!!

View from the Second Trimester

November 16, 2009 in Housewife's Life, babybabybaby, pregnancy, shopping | 2 comments

In two days, I will be 16 weeks along. Four months. And I am finally (hold on – let me cross my fingers and knock on every piece of wood I can reach…) starting to feel better!

Remember that time, about seven weeks ago that I seemed to be feeling better? Yes, I vaguely remember it too. It was a fleeting moment, and it turned out to be a cruel, cruel tease. I was not to be let off the hook quite so easily, and continued to be plagued by nausea and intense food aversions on a daily basis. Now, a few weeks into the second trimester, things seem to finally be calming down a bit (wait – let me knock on wood a few more times…), which is a very welcome relief. I am of course now experiencing new and exciting symptoms like the need to move from sitting or laying down to standing at the pace of a 90-year-old woman to prevent dizziness and queasiness, and daily indigestion and heartburn (thank goodness for Tums!).

Tums

But it’s not all discomfort and burping (though there is plenty of burping!), I have also been treated to the first fluttery feelings of movement from our real live baby inside of me, and I am now sporting a pretty obvious and, ifI dosaysomyself, adorable baby bump. Plus, we are within mere weeks of getting our chance to find out if the baby is a boy or a girl at an ultrasound next month, which The Accountant and I are very excited about.

Along with the second trimester and said baby bump, has come the need for a whole new wardrobe! And on that topic, I ask…what in the hell did women do before Old Navy Maternity??? I’ve found the maternity stores to be pretty disappointing in selection, and often over priced. But Old Navy? Well, aside from inconvenience that you have to order online (a couple of the stores around here have a maternity “department”…I use quotes because it is less a department than one lonely rack near the baby section), I couldn’t ask for more. Basic, comfy pieces. Decent fit. Great price. Regular promotions that allow me to get even further markdowns. Um, yes. Thank you, Old Navy.

Here’s what my wardrobe is looking like these days:

click to enlarge

Every piece is from Old Navy, and not one item cost more than about $25 (I believe the most expensive item was a dress for $26.50). Some of them were amazing bargains - like the purple dress, which I found on the rack at a local store on clearance for only $6.47. I have three pairs of the jeans (one of which I only paid $10 for by combining sales), and I use the leggings as tights with the dresses (warmer and more comfortable than tights), paired with mid-calf boots. Basically, I am a walking billboard for Old Navy’s maternity line.

Month four: new belly, new clothes, new love of Tums.

Start Spreading the News

November 1, 2009 in TTC, babybabybaby, pregnancy | 4 comments

I’m finally coming out from behind my password-protected posts and announcing that the Accountant and I are having a baby!

Here’s the view from inside my belly:

Just to clarify, that’s two pictures of one baby – no twins for us!

I’m now 13.5 weeks along, our immediate families know and are excited, and so there’s no longer any reason to be secretive. All of my formerly password-protected posts are now public, so if you never requested the password and need to catch up, check out the posts tagged “TTC” and “pregnancy” to see what you missed!

The Accountant and I were incredibly lucky to have a short and easy TTC (trying to conceive) journey, and feel insanely lucky and excited and thrilled and all that good stuff to be expecting our first child. The Baby is due to arrive on May 5, 2010.

Three

October 2, 2009 in Housewife's Life, babybabybaby, pregnancy | 3 comments

I have officially entered month three, and am anxiously awaiting its end so we can shout our news from the rooftops and share our joy with everyone – our news that we will no longer be two, but three.

The first two months have been a bit of a whirlwind of exhaustion and nausea and constantly trying to find something to wear! I’ve been feeling a bit better as of late, but there was a good stretch there that was really challenging. I knew I would be sick, but I didn’t anticipate how hard it would be to feel so nauseous, all day, every day. I also have had a lot of trouble sleeping, between the frequent trips to the bathroom to pee and the totally insane and vivid dreams. I would gladly choose all of this discomfort over the alternative of not being pregnant at all, but holy moly, has this baby already started turning life upside down!

With week nine has come a little more comfort. I am no longer constantly nauseous – still a little trouble in the morning, and again for the afternoon commute (never has my bus ride felt so long!!), but more manageable than before. Still not sleeping my best, but I’ve gotten into a routine of a new early bedtime and drinking less water before bed to try to limit my late night bathroom trips. I’ve also bought some bigger bras and pants and my first couple of maternity items to accommodate my ever-growing bust and middle, making it a little easier to find comfortable outfits to wear to work each day.

I have random moments of just feeling so dumfounded that we are here. That we are really having a baby – that our first try worked – and I am just overcome with gratitude and happiness.

Which reminds me…the hormones. Commercials make me cry. Dvr’d episodes of Ellen make me cry. My weekly emails from babycenter.com – Your baby is now the size of a grape! – make me cry.

The Accountant has been off the charts amazing. When I’ve been too tired to do the laundry or too grossed out by food to cook (or even walk through the grocery store), she has picked up the slack and then some. She brings snacks to me on the couch and emails me at work to see how I’m feeling. She tucks me in when I need to go bed at 8:00 and puts the kettle on for my tea in the morning.

So that’s where we are. Month three. The Accountant, the baby, and me.

***Edited 11/1/09:***
This post was password-protected from the time it was published until 11/1/09.